Men, Sex and Relationships is a collection of works from Achilles Heel , an influential magazine of sexual politics. First published in 1978, Achilles Heel explored questions of masculinity from a viewpoint that was sympathetic to the feminist critique of male power. The magazine also aimed to make public the collective explorations of men's emotional and sexual lives and relationships. Among the topics addressed in this collection are issues of childhood, sexualities and sexual identities, violence in its different dimensions, men's health, relationships and therapy. Especially insightful is the editor's introductory essay, which demonstrates just how closely intertwined are issues of sexuality and power.
Author(s): Victor J. Seidler
Series: Male Orders
Edition: 1
Publisher: Routledge
Year: 1992
Language: English
Commentary: 69579
Pages: 278
Book Cover......Page 1
Half-title......Page 2
Title......Page 4
Copyright......Page 5
Dedication......Page 6
Contents......Page 7
Preface and acknowledgements......Page 10
THE PUBLIC AND THE PRIVATE......Page 16
IDENTITY AND DIFFERENCE......Page 19
SEXUALITY AND RELATIONSHIPS......Page 23
LOVE AND ANGER......Page 27
ANGER AND RELATIONSHIPS......Page 31
SEX AND VIOLENCE......Page 33
LOVE AND INTIMACY......Page 38
MR PINE: FROM AN ACCOUNT OF MY CHILDHOOD......Page 42
CODES OF CONDUCT......Page 51
Note......Page 55
FROM AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY......Page 56
Primary school......Page 58
Eleven-plus......Page 59
Puberty and grammar school......Page 60
Sexual fantasy......Page 61
Ardent anti-sexism......Page 62
Letter......Page 63
Introduction......Page 66
Sexism and the creation of ‘men’......Page 68
Sexism and relationships......Page 71
Internal oppression and bad sex......Page 73
Sex therapy......Page 74
It can get better for us......Page 77
Conclusion......Page 79
‘I MEAN, YOU CAN HAVE A MALE-CHAUVINIST FANTASY…’......Page 80
WHY MUST I BE A 30-YEAR-OLD TEENAGER IN LOVE?’......Page 86
Some notes about my sexual history......Page 87
Heterosexism in Mike Singer’s article......Page 89
Collectively reconstructing our sexuality?......Page 91
Note......Page 93
LETTER TO A FRIEND......Page 94
HOW I GAVE UP PORNOGRAPHY......Page 98
References......Page 106
MOTORWAY CONVERSATIONS: SEX IN LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIPS......Page 108
BOYS AGAINST SEXISM......Page 116
CAN’T YOU GO SOMEWHERE ELSE!......Page 122
Memory: Midnight......Page 123
HEATH OR HOME......Page 125
SOME OF MY SEXUALITIES......Page 128
POEMS BY MARK TOLSON......Page 133
NOTE......Page 141
THE COLLECTIVE DISCUSSION......Page 142
The heart of the matter......Page 143
A price to pay......Page 145
MASCULINITY ACQUITTED......Page 146
Women to blame......Page 149
Sexuality and male power......Page 151
STONY SILENCES: A DISCUSSION OF ANGER AND VIOLENCE......Page 153
Within the body......Page 155
Boy, has he got a temper!......Page 156
With women......Page 159
Schooldays......Page 161
LIVE DANGEROUSLY: HOMOPHOBIA AND GAY POWER......Page 164
Be prepared......Page 165
So what happens?......Page 166
What do we do?......Page 167
What can anti-sexist pro-feminist men do?......Page 168
SEXUALITY AND MALE VIOLENCE......Page 170
Patriarchy, the family and the state......Page 172
Fascism and patriarchy......Page 175
The language of sexual violence......Page 179
Our daily needs......Page 181
‘Nagging’......Page 183
Note......Page 185
MACHISMO POLITICS: REAGAN AND EL SALVADOR......Page 186
Note......Page 192
‘I can’t explain my confusion’......Page 194
DEPRESSION......Page 205
It’s ‘real’......Page 206
Some unravelling......Page 207
Root causes......Page 209
Alternatives......Page 210
The left and self......Page 211
‘Unconclusion’......Page 213
NSU......Page 214
Antecedents: a poem......Page 221
SEXUALITY AND SELF-DENIAL......Page 224
Workshops......Page 227
An introduction......Page 232
Some of my process......Page 234
An end......Page 237
Note......Page 238
A WAY OF WORKING ON ONESELF......Page 239
DANCING EVOLUTION......Page 242
EMOTIONAL WORK......Page 248
EXPRESSION AND CONTAINMENT......Page 255
SELF-ESTEEM AND ENTITLEMENT......Page 257
VALIDATION AND EXPERIENCE......Page 260
SYMBOLS OF TRANSFORMATION......Page 264
CONTROL AND RESPONSIBILITY......Page 268
CARE AND RESPONSIBILITY......Page 271
Index......Page 276
